The lost child

A dainty child lost in a village fair, parted
from his millionaire parents, sobs for help.
His redden eyes lost in despair,
hankers for solace, but to no avail.
His Lilliputian steps strive to
transcend the segregation
as his soul is daunted and body
whelmed with tears of frustration.

Then there is this class of men,
who commemorates on the child agony,
without pulling him to succour.
There heart is full of apathy.
The world stands on a side and they the other.
They freeze their passion
“Who cares, let the child cry!!”,
so solitary is their emotion.

There is another class of men,
who is touched by child’s hysteria, overwhelmed
by sympathy, they approach the child
and console him with toys and fantasia.
Oblivious by the child’s real pain,
they make futile endeavour
and after squandering some time in vain
they abandon the child as ever.

There is yet another kind of soul, replete with
mercy he embraces the child by heart.
He scouts the original cause and
figures out the stray child’s opulent past,
He then shows the child to his original home,
And when the lost child sees his parents at last,
Flooded by ecstasy, hugs his parents to bosom.

and I danced in love !!!

One lonely starry night, I stole you and 
ran you up to the mountain dew. Longer and 
higher we flew, diving in the clouds blue,

up above the sky, by the world so far,

    till we reached wide cotton field lit with stars

Oblivious in musical song that magical night, 
when the suave moon lit like the candlelight,

I held you as your eyes rested on mine,

tapping our feet in the rhythm of time 

Gust of my love rustled your hair and 

my languorous eyes caressed your skin bare

We embraced feeling of dance that we adore
like the whirls of sea adores the lazy shore

I lead your waist  as you spun with a grace, and

U twirled and hugged me like a fairy’s brace.

Lifting you close then in the tango of bliss, 
Stealing that moment, I bid u a kiss,

Jumping up away then from cloud floor, we 
swayed and waved our stride to the moon’s door,

Slowly feeling your breath, melting by its heat, 

we united with love in an unfathomable beat.

I Love you baby !!!

Like Lovely petals of a lovely Rose,
I Long to Love you and come so close
to Your body and soul,
for I cant wait any more.
I would then whisper the words new,
I love you, I love you…
I love you Baby !!!

Listen to my heart and you will hear
the song of my love for you.
A song that will gently bring you near
and dance one, two, one, two
until you fell in my arms dear,
and then again I would whisper
I love you, I love you
I love you Baby !!!

Song of Sadness

Lost in the gust of rustling wind,

like a beaten skweing stray kite.

I meander on the lonley dark road,

in the clouded rays of lone night

No merciful light beacon my way,

and there’s none to help in dismay.

Abandoning kith, kin and dear wife,

I loaf in the darkest night of my life.

I sang, I danced and tippled wine,

with my family some days before,

I relished the beautiful time of my life,

I was their flower and they my cynosure.

Under the velvet sky we laughed,

and spent our seasons in the sun.

We laughed, we talked and threw pranks,

we made love and rolled with fun.

Sands of time then sank with a wail,

all in a spur, destiny staggered its sail.

mourning waves lapped bodies bled in red,

where my loved ones lied cold and dead.

Those happy flames are now doused,

And I meander lonely on the roads bend.

Heartless and gloomy to my hapless house,

burning candles at both my end.

A Counter Affair...

After an eternity, waiting lonely, teeming in the cacophony of Bangalore traffic, I saw the red Volvo staggering on the busy road searching its way towards me, perhaps for the bus stop, I mean. As its door slid open, I hastily clambered into the Volvo and within few seconds with one gust of powerful acceleration, its wheel teetered towards the main road and hit the stride to its normal pace. My journey being long, perhaps for an hour, I searched for the most comfortable seat at the back. Getting bored, I zipped out my incomplete fiction “Sleeping murder” and started construing the mystery of Agatha Christie. I had leafed in only a couple of pages, the bus screeched to halt. My body scooted forward from the seat in a jerk. I peeped outside the window. The Volvo had reached the next stop. A crowd of people elbowed their way into the bus. Aphetically I tucked my head again in the book oblivious of the swarm of people searching for a place. Nevertheless I was again busy reading my fiction. But as I had hardly read a paragraph I sensed an enticing female odor. I was at ones recharged and poised to find out the source of such an invigorating aroma. As I lifted my head, I was left stunned by the beautiful ethereal skin of her back. Her low cut, semi circle contoured black blouse perfectly embellished her white skin. A pendant solitaire was swirling by her ear and hair nicely kempt, some strands covering her arms. I was totally lost and mesmerized by the unseen face. Well, the travel now seemed to be more relaxing and I don’t know why but I started reminiscing cause of my journey this afternoon.

“Why did I agree my mother”, I cursed myself.
All I had to say her that I did not wish to marry now. It’s too early. I wanted to go according to my plans and resolution. Two years of work in an IT industry did not satisfy my ego and my needs. I wanted to do MBA and then work for Goldman Sachet, my dream company. But my mother who is elderly and the only person in my family wanted me to take the nuptial vows as early as possible. This was the reason I had to bow down to my mother regarding her proposal of me getting engaged.

I picked the red glossy envelope and reluctantly glanced at the profile of the girl. Her photo seemed to be appealing. Long hair with a shine in her eyes and well-contoured features on her youthful face gave her an alluring appearance. I didn’t even give a damn of other gory details of her profile. Who cares!!! I mused… I just had to complete the formality, a delusory errand to please my mother and then tell her I did not like the girl. “That’s it.”

Scanning her photo tantalized my male ego for a while, as I had never come across such an attractive looking girl. I just had one affair in my college in second year with an average looking chick but it broke as she left the college in third year. I had simmered down that relation, as she became very boring and insipid day by day and moreover she would now not stay in the college. I just forgot her within few days and I did not care to contact her again.

After a long time, I came across this girl who had something arresting in her. A streak of thought spurred my male emotions and I thought just to have rendezvous with this girl and then jilt up the marriage proposal right away. After all I had to fulfill my dream of completing my MBA and then a job at Goldman Sachet. I thought of meeting this girl just for an experience.


As the Volvo slowed down at MG road, I ogled my beautiful co passenger for the last time, got down and strolled towards CaféCoffeeDay by Splendor Mall. This place is one of the glossiest places in Bangalore owing to its exquisite and serene ambience and that’s the reason I e-mailed her and fixed our meeting here.

As I reached the CaféCoffeeDay I reserved the corner place for two persons and then looked around, scouting for the face that I was waiting for. After few moments I saw girl approaching towards me. Clad in tight jeans and a sleeveless top she showed a generous amount of cleavage. Her eyes had the same gleam as the one I saw in the photo and her hair preened in a similar fashion. I couldn’t believe my mother for making such a fancy choice for her bride. With each swinging stride she approached nearer and nearer. Our eye met and as I stood to greet her, she smiled and passed by me. I was startled by her indiscreet behavior and frowned, tightening my brows in contempt. My mother had made a wrong choice. It was incredible. “O Shit”, I mulled.

All of a sudden I sensed my mobile ringing. Fuming, I thought of throwing tantrums at my mother. How could she make such an atypical choice?
When I saw my cell phone, it was an unknown number. Nevertheless I received the call.

It was Deepika.
I couldn’t fathom what was happening.
She said she is waiting for me outside the CaféCoffeeDay. I was startled again. First I looked back and then forward. That skimpy sleeveless modern babe had disappeared.

I then saw a lady, standing alone outside the CCD, perhaps she was a girl in a black saaree with white purse on her slender arms looking around in eagerness. I came closer and I looked again, this time with a fixed gaze at her blouse. She was the same old co passenger in the Volvo some time back. The same ethereal white skin, the same low cut black blouse and the same pendant solitaire recklessly hanging by her ear. I looked around in anticipation I couldn’t find anyone else.


“Excuse me” , I whispered

She turned around. And for the next few seconds the earth below my feet moved and my heartbeat stopped in astonishment.

“Deepika…”
“Deepika Maheshwari…” , I mumbled as my eyes squinted in surprise.

“Hi…Siddharth”, she smiled and greeted me with gentle handshake.
“What a surprise…but…”
“You have changed….a lot…..You look so beautiful”

“Thanks”, she smiled again pulling her hairs from her eyes.
We then settled ourselves over hot cappuccino and cold frappe Strawberry and a soothing romantic number in background

She was not the same Deepika whom I loved in College. She had changed…and changed heavenly. She looked stunning. Her eyed reflected a different, unusual gleam that could light any soul. She looked more beautiful than I had imagined her from behind, in the Volvo. In those days she was plumper but today she looked slim, impeccably carved and her bosom protruded in flawless shape.

“So how have been since so many days… and you never cared to be in touch ?" , I asked her after a pause.

“Hey, not like that, I was busy with my graduation and the office was just too hectic…”

There was silence again. We both were not able to believe the incredible co-incidence or serendipity, what I mean. Words failed to come out my lips.

“Hey”, I interrupted the silence.

She looked up stirring her Strawberry shake coyly.

“Where did you graduate finally from and where are you working”, this was a couple of questions, which I could think of in eternity of time.

“IIIT Allahabad and am working for Infosys”

“What about you?"

“Am working for IBM”, I answered…

There was silence again…

Not knowing what to speak…. I then decided to buy a little courage from time and spilled…

“Hey, I tell you it was really very tough for me when you left the college…I was left all alone…I was snowed under your absence…and I cried slowly, limitlessly alone in my room but you never came back…Your manner, your voice, your sweetness lingered in my heart…I just ….I just…Any way….”,

I struggled for words…. Her presence had overwhelmed me….

“Life had not been good for me either…I too missed you a lot…I tried to contact you a couple of times but in vain…I thought you will write me sometimes…but nothing happened… I then thought u had forgotten me…”

“Hey...nothing like that…I tried…but…”, I tried to eclipse the truth

“But what Siddharth?”

"I just don’t know Deepu…I just don’t know…Maybe I expected the same from you”, I tried to parry her question and then tried to concentrate on my hot cappuccino.

“Am really very fortunate…I mean …its incredible…and now that we have finally come here at this point…after a long long time…I don’t know how to thank GOD”

I held both of her hand and continued…

“I don’t know how to thank GOD…My life will be full of peals of happiness and …it will be complete…I had lost you once and I don’t wanna lose you again……”
“Deepu…I wanna marry you”

Well I waited in peace…an overwhelming silence ruled over us…I was ready to hear the same from Deepika… Our lost love seemed coming to life ones again… Each and every second hurled the excitement that raced in me blood head over heels…. A happy married life…I kept pondering…

“I am Sorry Siddharth…you are wrong…I mean…I am already engaged”, She whispered looking straight in my eyes

“Engaged or getting engaged … right now…Good sense of humor Deepu…You are still the same ”, I giggled

“No, Siddharth…You are mistaken again… I am engaged to Sanjeev Kashyap, our batch mate if you remember… We got engaged last month, he is completing his MBA from IIM Ahmedabad and he’s made job in Goldman Sachet”…

“What” , I howled in surprise….

“I am not able to decipher this enigma…or are u still joking…”, I almost pounced …

I then try to recall my college days…

“Sanjeev Kashyap …Yes... yes… I remember… that short and introvert guy… that mediocre passed out from IIM Ahmedabad…what a surprise…n working for Goldman Sachet… Man, he has the qualification which I am aspiring for… n that dickhead is engaged to Deepika …”

This news hit my conscience like thunder… My head started reeling with unshakable enviousness.


“What…I mean…ok…what was that bio-data then? And what about the matrimony proposal that you sent me? Was this all a fake ploy that you are playing with me? … With my emotions? Now I know I was right actually… Any ways chuck it …”

“I know, Siddharth the double game that you always played with me…I always loved you with my true heart even though I knew that you were just playing with me… I knew you never loved me when we were in college though I always had a hope…It was just you wanted a girl friend and u found me as an easy prey… and when I quit the college…I knew …and you too ... that you were happy….I don’t need to repeat the same… you remember Deepika Shukla, … you’re next so called Love…”

Her words left me frozen like a zombie…

I tried to recollect… “Deepika… Deepika Shukla…Yes...I remember… Daughter of Kandarp Shukla, my dad’s business partner…We had an affair during my last semester in the college”

“But how did she come to know about her? Perhaps from some of her friends back in college” , I speculated

“Hi Siddharth”, a soft voice summoned me…

I turned around…and I saw something which I never expected…

It was Deepika Shukla, She was the same old skimpy babe whom I had guessed right initially….But by now, I fathomed the entire well-conspired ploy… Deepika Maheshwari tried to take revenge…I was snared ….I was made such a fool…I did not care to answer her…I left the place immediately.

When I reached home, I saw the matrimony profile lying on my table… I scanned it ones again…

“Shit man…She was Deepika Shukla, Daughter of Kandarp Shukla” , I wish I could have read this before.

“That unwomanly woman, bitch”, I mused and thumped my fist on the wall.

I cursed myself for not looking into the profile. I then slashed it to pieces and disposed the flotsam into the trash for ever…from my life.

Later on I just told my mother, I did not like the girl…

****************************

****************************

to the rains of Bangalore !!!

Rain rain. !!! You naughty rain!!!
Thou fall’s in the Bangalore plane,
now and again, now and again,
like the sprays of champagne,
pitter patter, pitter patter,
sporadically, unstoppably you entertain,
chitter chatter, chitter chatter,
without fear without pain, Ahhh!!!
Rain rain!!! Rain rain!!!

Up in the sky u play and roar,
with the winds, the sun on the cloud floor.
and when bore, you come down and pour
how grudgingly, our moods you ignore?
Abandoning cricket we go our home,
and curse you with tantrums galore.
While commuting always you snore
and we wait endlessly inside our door.
Oh!!! Rain, you naughty rain,
Do not ruin our moods again.

But rain, come down or shine,
Right or wrong, who cares for time?
and forget not, bring coldest ice from cloud nine,
for I wanna drench with dance and wine.
Chitter chatter or Pitter patter,
how you sing, it doesn’t matter.
But keep falling down the Bangalore lane
If not every where then in the 1st Main.
Time and again without fear and pain,
O’ Rain rain!!! Rain rain!!!

Schooldays...(fiction)

Winters have always been a tormenting in Bhagalpur. The cool breeze can shiver the strongest of soul. But for Saurabh there were no alternative.
The alarm clock punctually buzzed at 4 in the morning. Saurabh gazed the hands of the watch making a sharp 120 degrees with half opened sleepy eyes. He unwillingly sacrificed his golden sleep and sluggishly leapt for the History book on his study table.

He leafed through the pages of cold war squinting at the dates, wars and their causes. Making different eye brow shapes, trying to open his eye forcefully he kept repeating…

“To counter with German armament, Warsaw Pact was contrived in 1955’
“To Counter with German armament Warsaw pact”
“To Counter with Germaaannn….”

‘n finally dozed of while memorizing the chronicles of Cold War…He woke up several times in

between trying to learn the Cold War lessons but the enchanted sleep always snared him.

It was finally 7:30. He quickly threw quilt the other side, donned the school uniform with a red striped tie, combed hair making different face poses and adoring smartness in the mirror , he finally pedaled…

Racing through the university main road, old buildings with cracked paints due to rains since many years, a lake which flowed by the side of railway track with one or two aquatic flowers sprouting and unlimited mangroves that served as the backdrop to the school he finally reached the place five minutes late. He had to stay behind the assembly congregation as he was late. When the entire school was engrossed in the prayer, He was lost in apprehensions of the brutal history class in the third period. But at the same time the memories of Supa served as a consolation of whom he dreamt night and day.

* * * * *

“Locate, Bay of pigs?”, Father John bellowed flaunting bundle of sticks in the air
“Faaa…Father Hungarian crisis”, Saurabh choked trying to recall

It was a wasted attempt. One wrong word was enough to trigger Father’s anger as his stubby fingers caught hold and shook Saurabh’s chubby cheeks and throat profusely.

“Sorry faaaather, faaather its Czechoooo…slovakian…..crisis”, he mumbled as Father kept his cheeks pulling hard.

“Faaather its…..” as he was on his third attempt Father whipped him bizarrely with five sticks together and then with the torrent of his overused word, raining his saliva, howled.

“You kaddhu…I feel sooorry for you…
“You are just building castles in the air.”

And the tantrum continued haunting everyone till the bell for the break had gone and everyone then heaved the sigh of relief…Ahhh Thank God!!!

In the break, just outside the class, many students gathered. Some threw pranks laughing and pushing each other. Some just stared at the girls with budding round contour clad in tight sweaters and some for no reasons. Few paces away near the stair case Saurabh stood alone, silently waiting for Supa to pass by. He knew her daily chore, as in where she went everyday during the breaks and with whom she loved to talk etcetera.

Supa passed by, just a minuscule distance away barely touching his blazer, he felt the heat pounding in his heart. He glimpsed his sweetheart, she looked just beautiful as ever. The winter had softly made her cheeks red. Her shivering gait, a few strayed hairs trying to veil her eyes and her ear rings swayed up and down as she sprinted down the stair case. Her reddish white naked feet below her skirt gave Saurabh the clue of the hidden beauty she suppressed under her. He felt the heat running between his thighs…. Fantasizing!!!

When Supa reached the ground floor, she looked up playfully, for she knew Saurabh always ogled her. Saurabh blushed in acknowledgement tossing his hair. “Captivating beauty”, he mused.

Winning an awry look from the girls was not onerous job for Saurabh for his tall, dark and handsome personality did it all and Saurabh took its full advantage. Most of the girls liked him but he would not give them the lint of his shirt. However this formal way romancing with Supa went for some time. Saurabh used to toss his hair looking at her and she bloomed a smile looking down and when Supa stared him with her head straight but pupil sideway, he scratched his head raising it coyly, if you understand what I mean. She then always occupied the front bench waiting and when Saurabh zipped into the class in the morning, both of them would be lost in each other’s eye searching themselves, for a moment, for what seemed to them like an eternity.

* * * * *

Few weeks later…

“What an absurd question is this.”, he told himself.
He looked sideways towards his other classmates.
Everyone’s faces were blank. The questions were out of syllabus or perhaps not taught in the class. All but everyone could do was to quit the examination hall and throw stream of vulgar tantrums on their geography teacher named Mr. Lambros.
The hidden motto behind the complicated paper was understood as score of students joined him for tuition.

“A tuition for Geography, damn it!!! No chance”, he raised his voice.
“C’mon Saurabh, it’s a matter of just another exam, n then who cares”, admonished Priyanka, his class mate and neighbor.

“Its fine, I will take care of it”, he said with disregard, for he dint like Priyanka. She was one of those behinji types of girl whose life just whirled around her parents and studies. Apart from some good manners, grades and smile she did not had one strand of hair to flaunt.

“And by the way, what would he teach, the same damn stuff in the textbook. Right?”, he added almost pouncing.

“Its up to you. By the way, Supa and me going tomorrow”, said Priyanka playfully for she knew Saurabh’s heart more than him, if you understand what I mean.

The next day Mr. Lambro’s verandah was full of students who were inspired to pass geography in their coming exam. Lambros, a Christian in his mid thirty’s was 6’2” tall and equally stouter. He held the book, which looked so negligible in his two broad figures and kept vomiting for one hour without a pause. Saurabh kept drafting the notes with a divided attention towards Supa’s tight jeans and revealing t-shirt. The inner strap that curved her bosom was thinly visible as he relished the nectar for the first time.

* * * * *

Supa had taken a toll on Saurabh’s mind and body as he kept dreaming of her. He always thought of approaching her in the morning when both of them looked each other. Every night he gathered courage and every morning he went numb and frozen. This continued for a while until one day he found a ray of hope in Priyanka for both of them appeared to be closed friends.
One Saturday, just outside Mr. Lambros verandah

“Priyanka, I wanna tell you something”
“Yes”, she heaved a long sigh in anticipation.
“I have fallen in love with Supa and I want you to this convey this message to her”

“Why don’t you tell her yoursef”, she replied after a long pause as they kept strolling.
“Am very scared, you know but am sure you gonna help me”, Saurabh pounced in one deep breath.
Priyanka looked into his eyes with a lost hope.
“But she…she is … Saurabh…Saurabh”, she felt a touch on her shoulder. Surprisingly when she looked up she found Saurabh had gone.
It was Supa’s hand.

“What was he telling Supa”, Priyanka asked inquisitively.
“Nothing!!! He was just asking for my notes”, she retorted looking down.

But then, nothing happened, Priyanka kept mum and Saurabh could not gather enough courage to propose Supa.

His patience mitigated day by day...

* * * * *

Then in one of the history class,

“NAM, Non Align Movement, 1950. The purpose was to ensure national independence, sovereignty, territorial integrity and security of non-aligned countries in their "struggle against imperialism, colonialism, neo-colonialism and racism”.

Father John was busy in reading these texts from the world history book. Everybody in the class was scarily glued to their text but for one. The one who was buried scribbling in a loose paper with an undivided attention.

All of a sudden the roar came to halt and everyone looked in surprise. Father stood like a flaring edifice near Saurabh, but a bird didn't chirp in his head.

“Saurabh…”
What is happening…..What is happening here”, a deep harsh voice echoed the entire classroom…
Saurabh fiddled with the paper and froze to terror. His strokes of beard at the chin got erected and earlobe turned red as he raised his neck to see the death personified human standing right in front of him.

“Faaather….”, he strangled with his voice trying to smash the paper with the other hand.

Father leapt for the paper and snatched it. His eyes slowly turned red hot and his body stiff with rage as he read the love letter for Supa.

A downpour of sticks along with spurt of words continued for another ten minutes that left red mark on Saurabh’s face and body. He then summoned Saurabh and Supa to his chamber and ordered the peon to draft a suspension letter in their name.

* * * * *

A Cup Of Tea...

An old gray cup tarnished and jaded,
with a broken handle and color faded
bruised by fate of time, ‘twas
my paraphernalia since I was nine…
As every dawn broke into my bedroom
Mummy would brew steaming sweet tea
‘n serve me with biscuits and spoon…
I would then peck my golden cup with yawning lips
by ‘n by savoring sip by sip,
relishing the honeyed tea in a china cup alloyed clay
It made me fresh like a morning dew, the entire day…

Today,
far far away in a Coffee day…
Baskin with a regal cup brimming with tea.
I swallow the sip lost in a reverie,
of the morning, tea, spoon and cookie,
Of the cup full of life and my cuppycake MUMMY…

A Walk to Remember...(fiction)

14th February, an evening on the bank of Ganges...Sun descending in the horizon paving its gleaming path on the azure water...the birds were flying away along the southern sky to their nest and me lying all alone, aloof away from the hustle and bustle in the serenity of cool air that had borrowed the freshness from water...I was waiting for Sonal...We often spend time here rambling on the sand and talking each other for hours together...She had promised me to meet here...As the dawn grew older waiting, I couldn’t stop myself remembering those sweet pastimes with her in our college days that were strongly fastened in my heart...

*****************************************

It was 8’O clock in the morning...I lit my cigarette, took shower with the deodorant and washed my face in order to avoid my slovenly appearance...wearing black jeans and denim jacket I rushed towards the Dance club room...As I reached there I fling the cigarette from my mouth...I gazed at my watch...I was fifteen minutes early to the club...I headed into the room as I saw Sonal sitting on the last bench alone, looking out of the window...Her hairs were dancing along with fresh morning breeze... "Captivating look" , I mused...........she was the first one to reach for the practice…As I walked closer towards her, my heart started pounding...Collecting my energy and sounding as normal as possible I wished her ...........“Hi”
“Hi” , she retaliated with a sweet smile...
“How are u doing?” I asked
“Fine.........and you?
“Fine” , I said clearing my throat.

And then deafening silence ruled us for few minutes as I saw her enjoying the morning Sun out of the window...I finally decided to speak...One of the few safe questions I had thought while cycling on my way to the club...

“what’s your discipline ?” , I questioned sounding little more friendly this time...
“Mechanical” , she replied immediately turning towards me...
“and how long u had been dancing ?”
The answer to this questions was long one...She spoke how her father instilled the dancing talent in her right from her childhood as he himself was a classical dancer...Exuberantly she kept telling about her achievements in dance until all the other members arrived for the practice...

Sonal and I were selected in the Dance club audition and we had our first practice session today...The Songs were finalized for “TARANG” , our cultural festival and fortunately we were in the same dance...This was the first time I spoke to her...I felt the simplicity in her heart that I never found before in any one...She had the demeanor soft and childish that I always looked for in a girl...Her light brown eyes had the water and her eye lashes curly arrayed, amplified her beauty...She was very friendly right form our first meeting clouding the fact that we met for the first time...

************************************************

Days converted to months and our friendship grew stronger with every dance practice...We kept meeting and spending time together during and after our practice sessions...Sometimes we would walk together to temple in the evening, sometimes for the dinner and sometimes we just gossiped...Every Saturday we strolled on the bank of Ganges that flowed just by the side of our college...We sat their and kept talking for hours together until the moon peeped and gestured us the time to go back to our hostels...We talked about our families, friends, likes, dislikes, family stories, habits and what not? But I never told her that I smoked, for I knew she hated smoking and I did not wanted to loose her as a friend...

“Hey Rahul...You danced well today, it seems you practice a lot at your hostel”
“Yeah I do...But by the way what are you doing tomorrow on Valentine’s day?” , I asked sounding as normal as possible though with a surprise...
“Nothing much..........I am still single” , she told coyly as her eye met mine...
“And what about you Rahul, you never told me about your girlfriend? Not fair haaan”
Our eyes still looked each other reluctant to look else where…I could see her eyes deep brown eye reflecting the fading Sun on the bank of Ganges as we kept strolling...
“I am proposing someone...the one who is very close to me...I love her lots and am sure she loves me too”, I said convincingly smiling at her...

Sonal knew that I talked to very few girls in the college...Apart from Kriti, who was my city mate she was the only girl whom I was close with...whom I loved talking for hours...and with whom I was talking right now...

“Hey Rahul, Is it Kriti?” , She mumbled artificially trying to be oblivious of the truth...
“Kriti!!! No way.......Pllllz.......She’s so boyish and moreover she is committed to Abhishek” , I said almost instantly making the secret more obvious...

For the first time I, what seemed like forever, said to her something very spontaneous, something I never thought of telling her until this valentine...But she had comprehended everything by now...I knew...And now that I told her, I didn’t knew what would be her reaction ?What would she think? Thousands of such question whirled in my head...

Feeling the cool breeze on her face, she pulled her hair back from her face and slowed down her walk...
“So, who is she Rahul? Is she from our college?” , She interrogated almost in a slender voice persuading me to open the Pandora’s box...
“Yes”, I shrugged coming closer to her as our shoulder’s briefly touched each other’s ...
“Hmmm, you cheater...You never told me about her” , She chipped in eclipsing the truth from herself...

We kept walking in the evening a little longer than we usually did...It was a walk to be cherished for lifetime...I had drifted more intimate and closer to her unlike always...I held her hand for the first time ever...Though she was surprised she never pulled it back...Her body touched mine several times and each time I felt her warmth like never before...The crescent moon had started peeing emanating its soothing light on the water making it look more ethereal...We understood it was our time to return back to our hostels...

As we were almost on the city roads away from the bank …she looked at me as her hairs nudged my shoulder.... "Hey Rahul, may I ask you one personal question if you don’t mind"

I felt my heart pounding in suspense... "Yeah!!! Sure" , I shrugged...
“Why do you smoke so much?”
Her question left me Numb and frozen as a gust of wind tossed my hair...
“No.......I don’t..........I mean...not much.........Only sometimes” , I tired to parry her question but in vain...I was caught by her innocence...
“Don’t lie Rahul, You still lingering its smell...”

Looking at my shirt...
“See!!! You don’t know the art of escaping...Piggy” , she smiled listlessly...
I looked at “Wills Classic”, the label was peeping from my translucent shirt pocket...
“Dickhead” , I mused cursing myself...

“I try avoiding a lot ...But...”
“But, you can’t...right!!! It’s ok...But I know you will be able to quit it” , She interrupted in between...I could see genuine concern on her face...

That day I decided not to smoke any more...for I could do anything for her...I loved her lots...I looked at her face again...She was staring at the moon...Her ear ring gleamed its light...Her simplicity defied the beauty of the moon perhaps that’s why the moon was crescent today...Her hairs and the wind played hide and seek with her soft neck and ears...I kept worshipping her beauty as we walked towards our College holding each others hand...

“Rahul” , she broke the silence
“Yes” , I acknowledged lost in my own thoughts...
“Your Hostel is towards left...Its time for me to leave”

I navigated the way...
“Yes we have to leave...Why the time runs so swiftly” , I mused cursing time...

I don’t know but I decided to buy a little time from her...I gazed at my watch...Only five minutes were left before her hostel’s gate would close...I recollected my energy...I prayed to God...I begged my Omen...for I couldn’t wait any more...

“Sonal, I love you” ,I held her hand and spoke spontaneously without much thinking...

“Rrright from day one, whheeen………..when I saw you in the dance auditions, I started liking you…………………..Earlier I thought it might be an infatuation… but later,…………..later as the time passed by…I came to know you better…I alwayssss waited for the dance practices to get over……… so that I could walk with you to the temple………I always waited for the Saturdays to come,….. so that I can spend time with you near Ganges……….Whenever the phone rings, my heart starts pounding thinking it might be you…I know……………I know I smoke but I promise I will quit…Trust me,………Trust me, I will never ever smoke again…You are so simple, charming and wonderfully created by GOD…Pleeeeease tell me ones……Plz that you have the same feeling as I do……..I love you lots….…I just love u Sonal…and am sure you love me too”

I just spoke these words almost unexpectedly because my heart urged me to do so...I could no longer wait for Valentine’s day...I just proposed her with a heavy breath summoning all my good fortunes and positive vibes that I could...

Silence struck both of us for a moment...The only things that I could hear was my heavy breath as I awaited her answer...

All of a sudden she pulled her hand and started walking towards her hostel...I still awaited for her response...She entered the hostel main gate not caring to look back even ones...I stood frozen...She was about to turn left towards her room and then all I could glance is the yellow painted wall of the hostel wing...I was almost shattered by now...

She turned back suddenly...I looked at her eyes, it was totally wet...She smiled at me and bid me a flying kiss...Incredibly I tossed my hair kneeling on the road...I felt euphoric like never before...I had got an answer...yes......................yes,she loved me too...I was right!!! I bid her a flying kiss too...Blushingly she zipped in, towards her room making me watch the yellow wall of the hostel wing...

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An Ode to my Valentine...

Me, You and Solitude waited and longed,
since long long time until
tonight, when its Valentine…
The shimmering light winks and shine your
solitaire amidst the lull of rays that gleam at
your neck and my solitary way…
My heart’s pounding for Love , for the need to hold you,
savor you. I maneuver, measure and mitigate
our distance with heavy soundless gait…
The sound pauses, the wind ceases and the space
between our soul seems meaningless….
Aaah !!! I moaned as I caressed you in slow motion
and fondled your curvy body top to bottom
rubbing against my bearded cheeks…
My tongue that endured your separation,
yearned endlessly for your vermillion lips and
kissed you until you whispered a fizzing and oozing
sensation…
I tasted it, kissed it, that at last quenched by draughty lips.
The nectar, smooth as velvet, soft as the golden sword, crept
in my heart. It raced in my blood and I went on gulping
the pitcher of your love
ones…twice…thrice….a millionth time
until everything in you were mine…
O Red one...O dear Wine!!! My sweet Wine…
I need you…I owe you…I love you...
for tonight you are my Valentine !!!

Musing by the Sea Shore

Basking in the sand by the sea,
I muse at its azure water running towards me...
Gently I cupped it, kissed it,
As she blushingly fell on my knee...

I wish I would be the sun,
away from land, away from kin...
I would savor your smell and rise in horizon,
and kiss you until morning...

I wish I would be the sky,
clouding unto thee with the rainbow hue...
I would keep pouring down from long way up,
just to say how much I love you...

I wish I would be the breeze,
slowly I would whisper my feelings and jingle...
I would whirl and dance around you
and make u smile with cute dimple...

How I wish I would keep musing,
like the sun the sky and the breeze...
That loves so much the sea,
Ahh!!! Why not me...